A New Beginning

Today was a good day.  Today was a hard day.  Today was a new beginning.  This is Megyn's mom by the way. 

Today we dropped miss Megyn off at the MTC.  Last night she was set apart as a full time missionary for the Church Of Jesus Christ Of Later Day Saints. 

I cried a little, its ok, so did she.  We spent the last evening with our family, doing what we do best, eating ice cream and laughing.

But this is not about me, it is still Megyn's blog.  She asked me to keep it updated.  I will try but its been almost a year since I put anything on my own blogs. I am going to try and post her emails and news here so that those who want to keep up with what she is doing will be able to. I don't spell well and I don't write near as well as she does so  we will see how it goes.

For today, I just want the world to know, my daughter, Megyn is a sister missionary and I LOVE HER!!!

My Boat

Eleven days!!!! 11 days!!! In eleven days I will be sitting in our cute family mini van driving away for the MTC to serve the lord for eighteen months. The closer it gets the more intense my emotions become. I am scared, excited, nervous, anxious, sad, and extremely happy!!! I am afraid of what I will miss. I am afraid of not hearing my parents voice for eighteen months except at Christmas and on mothers day. I am afraid of missing Aryn's wedding. I am afraid of missing Tyson's first prom. I am afraid of missing Jennifer growing into a women, I am afraid of not being home when Rachel comes home from college for her first time and witnessing how much she has changed. I am afraid of not being here when my first niece or nephew enters the world ( neither Tia or Brittney are pregnant do not get excited) I am afraid of missing Nicholle's graduation, I am afraid of not being at school and not being able to build more memories with Brittney, Kaley, or Patrick. I am afraid of missing Tadja and Parker, what if they have a baby while I am gone??? I am afraid of missing my bossom friend Nicole . For two years she has been the very person I tell everything to, I can't describe how frightened I am of not having her with me everyday. 

At times all of these fears and many others become so overwhelming I almost pull the plug on the whole thing. I am not strong enough to live in a strange humid place where I don' know anyone one for a year and a half. To say I am afraid is an understatement. 

" The lord commanded Nephi to go an build a boat" I have been asked to build a boat. Many could say it was my choice and I do not have to go. They are correct it is my choice and I don't have to go. However I have felt the lord ask me to serve and I have heard his promise that I would be blessed for my efforts and service. I am afraid of this boat I have been asked to build, I am however more than anything else excited. I am excited and thrilled to live in a strange humid place with people I don't know. I am ecstatic to work the hardest I have ever worked. I am so beyond excited to live closer to the lord then I ever have and witness first hand his countless miracles as he blesses the people of Virginia. I am not strong enough to take on this adventure on my own. However with my father in heaven and my savior I am strong enough to conquer the world. With them I can build any boat and take on any adventure. 

Life has not slowed down since the grand opening of the mission!! I am starting to wonder if there is enough time to get everything done ( I can only imagine how my poor parents feel). One thing that has helped a million times over has been the opportunity to go to the temple. I had the opportunity to go through for the first time about three weeks ago and it was the most amazing experience of my life!!! It is so great to take a break from all the shopping, working, and craziness to spend time in the lords house. I love the temple and I am so grateful we have so many temples so close.
I am getting more and more excited to serve a mission. After hours and weeks of shopping we are pretty much done clothes shopping. We have pretty much hit up every store within the state of Utah ( at least that is what it feels like) I NEVER thought I would say this, but I am sick of shopping!!!! I love spending the time with my mother and surprisingly we have agreed on ALMOST all of my outfits. However I am glad the shopping part is almost over. I am getting anxious to leave. I cannot wait to serve in the MTC. I cannot wait to wake up everyday at 6:30 instead of 4:00. I cannot wait to meet my companions. I am so excited for the next eighteen months!!
I am going to miss my family so so so much. but hey eighteen months is not that long and we will be reunited before you know it!!!!

I hope they call me on a mission....oh wait they did!!!!!! :):)

It has finally happened!!! After all of the shots, freak outs, frustrations, and prayers I have received my mission call!!!!!
I have been called to serve in the Richmond Virginia Mission!!!!! :):):)
While preparing to serve a mission I had a feeling that I would be called to serve in state, "well dang it" was my first response. I want to go somewhere cool!!! When I was asked where I wanted to go I would explain that a mission is a mission and I was happy to serve; I think I was trying to convince myself more than anyone else. I had just left the worlds greatest job at the worlds greatest university to serve and I wanted it to be worth it.
My mission has the potential to be the greatest thing I will ever do, that has nothing to do with where I serve, but how I serve.
The Sunday before I opened my call I had the opportunity to attend a homecoming. I did not know the sister, but her words touched me. The lord reminded me that the gospel is meant to be shared with all of his children whether they live in a "cool" place or not. It was selfish of me to only want to serve Foreign or in a great big city. The lord loves all of his children and I have been blessed to grow up in an environment where I learned and gained a testimony of this gospel, it is my responsibility to share this knowledge and love with others, regardless of where they live.
With that being I am beyond excited to serve in Richmond Virginia!!!!! I already love this place and I have never even been there!!!
I am excited and scared that my call date is so soon!!! While back at school I had a conversation with my fantastic boss, I told her I want to serve sooner rather then later. We had a great conversation about serving in state, my reason for wanting to leave ASAP, and the great blessings of a mission. After opening my call I knew the lord was listening in on that conversations, and my Boss was a truly inspired person. I had never really prayed to leave earlier, because I knew the lord would take me when he needed me. However I am so grateful that he knew my worries, fears, and anxiousness to serve.
I AM A MISSIONARY FOR THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST OF LATTER DAY SAINTS!!!'AHHH!!!!!!
This is really happening and I could not be more scared or excited!!!!!
Get ready Richmond Virginia I am on my way!!! :):):)

I am excited for forever :):)

Today I was in my kitchen making brownies and as I licked the spoon I was reminded of the time my roommates and I mixed the brownie batter and ate just the batter for days. :):):)
I miss it, I miss all of it. I miss my gorgeous roommates who drove me crazy, made me smile and laugh, and who became my family. I miss going to class instead of work. I miss the cute boy who stole my heart. I miss the mentors who worked with SANS. I miss the best RA's and coworkers. I miss the two best bosses anyone could ever have. I miss the residents who stressed me out, who I loved, and who I had a blast with. I miss College!!!!!! I had the two best years of my life and saying goodbye is extremely hard.
With that being said I am beyond excited for what comes next. I am overly excited and scared to serve a mission. I am ecstatic to fall in love again and again and start a family; a family I will be with forever.
I have been molded and shaped in the past two years into the person that I am. However I am not done, I will continue to change and grow. Both of which scare me immensely. I am terrified of change; however I said the same thing when I left high school and my life has only improved since then.
" Come what may and love it" right?
My dear best friend has just been married in the temple. :):):) I cannot express my excitement for her. My two older sisters just bought a house. Rachel and Tyson are both working for their first jobs, and Miss Jenna joe is trying out for dance company. People change, life goes on and usually it is for the better.
I am excited for forever :):):)

I believe in miracles

I believe in miracles, I believe in love, and I believe in Happiness.

I am grateful it is not my choice.

I am saddened by what the world has come to, by what we have let it become. I mean no disrespect to any individual or community, however before you read on I will warn you that you may not agree with what I say. I believe in freedom. I believe that every individual has the right to make their own decisions and answer to the consequences of those decisions  I believe the war in heaven was real, I believe that our savior fought along side us for our agency. With that being said I believe that marriage is a sacred ordinance between a man and a women, and with our heavenly father. It would seem to most that my two beliefs are extremely contradictory  which is why I am grateful that marriage equality is not my choice. It is not my chose because it is not my place to make a decision that will affect countless others.
I may not understand why our heavenly father has commanded that a man and a woman join together in marriage. I however to understand that my father in heaven is perfect. He is all knowing, and he is kind and loving. I also know that our father in heaven would never give us a commandment that we can not fulfill. He knows what is in our hearts because he is the creator of them.
our bodies were created in his image, just as a man is suppose to love a women, all humans are suppose to have two arms and two legs. We are all aware however that this is most defiantly not the case. We all have trails that we must overcome, Heavenly father has blessed us with our trails that we may learn in this life and grow closer to him.
With that being said I believe the greatest trail we must all overcome is the judgment we throw at one another. We understand that god has commanded a man and a women to be married, however what we do not understand is that not everyone has had the same convictions that we have had. Others do not understand why marriage is sacred for a man and a women; this is does not make them evil or wrong, it just makes them different. We believe that we will be held accountable for what we know to be true. We know that marriage is sacred, not everyone has this knowledge, they will be judged for the knowledge they do have. We also know that all of gods children are equal and should be treated with love and respect. ALL of his children. Just as our savior suffered for each of us, he also suffered for homosexual individuals  He sat with them as they struggled through their decisions, he held them while they were mocked and scorned, he wiped their tears, and he loves them. Why would anyone chose such a life, why would anyone chose to be scorned and mocked? I have meant countless individuals who have been told they have a disease and that a doctor, a therapist, or some sort of special tea will "cure" them. this is not the case!!! the power of god is the only thing that will bring them comfort. I did not say it will heal them. They were given this trail and if they endure it well great shall be their reward. It is the same as it is with any burden or trail the rest of us carry.  Our savior felt their pain, and he loves them, just as we should. Homosexual individuals are not evil, bad, or corrupt. They are fantastic individuals with sweet sweet spirits who have made a different choice then us, and they have all the same rights as anyone else. We will never understand gods reasoning. We are not god.  God has demanded that we love all of his children. We are not to judge others for their decisions. Disrespect toward the gay community is unacceptable. We are to love everyone. All of us sin, our right to do so is not being debated in the supreme court, so we somehow feel that makes us greater than them, It does not.
Equal marriage rights may pass.
 I promise that no matter the decision made in the supreme court God will never leave any of his children in darkness. He promised that the holly ghost may always be with us if we live righteously, not if the world does. All we have to do is worry about us, teach our children about their loving father in heaven, and love one another. The choices of others are not our concern. I will never understand the emotions of another individual therefore I do not get to judge them. I get to love them.
I recommend that everyone visit them website  http://www.mormonsandgays.org/ It is a fantastic website where apostles and LDS. individuals who have struggled with same sex attraction discuss their love of god and share their personal experiences.

I choose to win

My heart is full today and I am not exactly sure what to say. This has been one of the most testing and trying weeks of my life. I didn't know if I was strong enough to make it through this trail. However I have learned a lot this week. I have learned that people are entirely and absolutely good; we as a species may be entirely selfish and self-consumed, however in the face of tragedy( or at least what feels like it) individuals are able to put themselves aside and help a friend in need. Every man carries with them the light of Christ and it shines through in the face of adversity.  I will never forget the friends I have or the sacrifices they have made for me. I have learned that I am stronger than I ever thought I could be. I have learned just as I have time and time before that my father in heaven loves me, he will carry me every step of the way and will never leave me in darkness.

I cannot say I didn't bring this upon myself I knew exactly how this would have to end, but as a friend once told me “I couldn't not take the chance". It sounds cheesy, but my life has been changed and I wouldn't take back a single moment or a single lesson I learned through this experience.

It has been a hard month. Facebook feels like the pit of despair with one tragic post after another.  I have found several of my friends with their heart and their spirit broken.  I have caught myself wishing I could offer comfort, however there was/ is nothing I can to heal their hurt or improve the situation. I guess that is not my job. Just as I cannot struggle through my own trails alone I cannot fix the trails of others.

“My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes.”

I promise that our father in heaven loves his children. We will never be alone. I understand that life can be hard; losing sucks, losing anything, a loved one, a relationship, a friendship .Our father in heaven will make all of this up. We have the opportunity to choose not to lose. God is going to win. Our savior gave his life and because of his sacrifice we never have to be alone again. God is going to win; we simply have to choose to be on his side. I understand that this decision may not be as easy as it sounds. However I know that our father in heaven loves us, is aware of our struggles, and is aware of our pain. This is why he allowed his precious begotten son to suffer on the cross; for you and me. Our savior went through every possible amount of pain we can conceive and then some. It was not in vain. I will not waste his atonement.

God is going to win!!!! We are going to win, and every ounce of pain will be made up. Today I choose to stand with my father in heaven. I choose an eternal family, I choose to serve a mission for the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints, and I choose to be happy. 

A Life To Remember

I was going to start off by saying, what a crazy couple of weeks, but I realized that is just about how all of my posts start. I guess I just live one crazy life!

Well for those of you who may have missed the news My best friend since the premortal life is engaged! Her finance Parker is the sweetest, greatest, and most fantastic person. I could not have picked two individuals more perfect for one another. Tadja Potter has changed my life. I can honestly say I would not be the same person had she not blessed my life. When we were both younger I would come home from a weekend at her house, I would want to be cleaner and have more pink decorations just like her. I would want to take better care of my toys and clothes so they could be as nice as hers. However as I grew older and would return from her house I would still want to change to be just like her, but I wanted, I want, to be more spiritual  more involved in this wonderful gospel, more patient, more righteous, more like this amazing spirit god has blessed me with. I do not know what I did to be so lucky as to deserve a best friend like her, but I am grateful everyday that she has been here to influence my life. 

We spent the weekend wedding planning and dress shopping, as I sat on the train I had the startling realization that this is the last time it is ever going to be like this. Our lives are changing forever. while growing up we all made plans of our future lives that included each other. while we will always love each other and we will always be close, everything is going to change. Tadja potter is getting married MARRIED! I am headed off to who knows where to serve the lord for eighteen months and Nicole has her whole life ahead of her, if anyone is going to make a difference in this world it is going to be her. I have never meant another individual who feels so deeply, who loves so much, and who has such a tender heart. Our lives are changing and just as they should, our plans do not revolve around one another anymore. After this summer it is all going to change. It is exciting and scary all at the same time! sometimes when life gets stressful I like to think back to days spent in the sun playing dress up and eating Popsicle with tadja or nights spent at Nicole's house laughing and giggling for what felt like eternity. 

I hate change, it scares and excites me all at once. we spent our childhood planning these days, waiting non to patiently, to find our prince charming and running off into the sunset. Do not get me wrong i love my life, i have been so blessed and i could not be happier, but as I sit here living the exact moments we would dream about I cannot help but miss the memory of it all. 

Life is funny like that. We are never fully satisfied with where we are. I always want what I do not have. Last year at this time I wanted to be an RA more than anything, and now I want more than anything. I forget that although time is not money I can waste it and blow it, just like money, on trivial shallow experiences. I want my life to be something remembered. I want more than anything to make a difference, I want someone to hear my name and smile. 

My goal today is to make a difference, to make a memory.